What Matters, in the End
The gift of being here
Dear friends,
Every year or so, I find myself returning to a letter written by a young woman named Holly Butcher. In 2018, at age 27, she died from Ewing’s sarcoma, a rare and aggressive cancer that mostly affects young people. Before her passing, Holly penned a letter about the joy of living, what truly matters, what doesn’t, and how precious our time here really is. It’s not morbid, it’s not heavy, it’s simply honest and beautiful.
Her words are a reminder to breathe deeper, love harder, and let go of the small things. To stop waiting for the “right time” to live the life you want.
I hope it resonates with you the way it has with me. You can read her letter below, edited for clarity and brevity.
With gratitude,
Matthew
Life Advice from Holly Butcher
It’s a strange thing to realise your mortality at 26 years young. The days tick by and you just expect they’ll keep coming, until the unexpected happens.
I always imagined myself growing old with the love of my life, raising a big, beautiful family. I want that so bad it hurts.
But that’s the thing about life: it’s fragile, precious, and unpredictable. Each day is a gift, not a given right.
I don’t want to go. I love my life. I am happy. But the control is out of my hands.
Please stop worrying about the small, meaningless stresses. Try to remember that we all have the same fate, so do what you can to make your time feel worthy and great—minus the bullshit.
When you're whining about ridiculous things, think of someone truly facing a problem. Be grateful for your minor issue. Take a deep breath of fresh air. Look at how blue the sky is and how green the trees are. Just breathe. That alone is a gift.
You might have had a rough day at work, or a bad haircut, or feel annoyed about your body. Let all that go. I swear you won’t be thinking about any of it when it’s your time to go.
I hear people complain about work or how hard it is to exercise..be grateful you’re physically able to. I tried to live a healthy life. That was my passion.
So appreciate your body, even if it’s not your ideal size. Move it. Nourish it. But don’t obsess over it. And if someone on your feed makes you feel like shit, unfollow them. Be ruthless for your well-being.
Whine less. Help more. Give, give, give. You get more joy from doing for others than for yourself. I wish I had done more of that.
Don’t waste your money on stuff. Spend it on experiences. Cook your friend a meal. Buy them a coffee. Write them a letter. Say “I love you” and mean it.
Get amongst nature. Dig your toes in the sand. Stop trying to capture everything through a phone screen. Life isn’t meant to be lived for a perfect photo.
Wake up early and listen to the birds. Hug your dog. Really talk to your friends. Put your phone down and ask them how they are.
Work to live, don’t live to work. Do what makes your heart feel happy. Eat the cake. Say no when you need to. A “mediocre” life is perfectly okay if it brings you peace.
And if something is making you miserable—your job, your relationship, whatever—have the guts to change it. You don’t know how much time you’ve got. Don’t waste it being miserable.
Lastly: donate blood. Every donation can save three lives. It gave me an extra year of life, a year I’ll be forever grateful for.
…’Til we meet again.
Hol
xoxo