On loving yourself truly and deeply
A meditation on the book, “Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It" by Kamal Ravikant
In his book entitled “Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It,” Kamal Ravikant brings us the idea of loving ourselves truly and deeply, regardless of circumstance. Let us reach a state of inner peace through persistent self love and self care, every day, in ritual form. I read it over the last week and found the meditations to be beautiful and functional. Sometimes, I held the book to my heart and cried at how much it woke me up to the beauty of life, and the beauty that lies within ourselves. It was a reminder to make a point to savoir each day for which we are fortunate enough to be alive.
Ravikant explains how meditating on self love ought to become a routine as familiar as brushing our teeth. It’s an easy read, beneficial if you’re so low that you’ve forgotten everything you ever knew about happiness. It’s also beneficial if you’re in a good mental space, because it offers techniques to improve our lives and love ourselves fully. Almost always, we can do that more.
One of the central principles is to repeat the mantra: I love myself. I love myself. I love myself. And to take 10 deep breaths at every moment we can, repeating “I love myself” with each breath. The idea is to forgive ourselves and embrace ourselves. One helpful exercise is to write a list of self forgiveness. “I forgive myself for…” Or “I love myself because…”
Ask yourself: “If you loved yourself truly and deeply, what would you do?”
This one got me. We can make a list of everything we would do if we truly loved ourselves. We can also ask ourselves this throughout the day to inform how we spend our time and what we do. If we truly loved ourselves, maybe each day would include exercise to love our bodies and minds. Maybe it would include eating as healthy as we can. Or maybe it would include cutting out all of the distractions -- TV, scrolling through social media, other people complaining -- that get in the way of us becoming our best self.
Ravikant’s central question also can be framed as: "If I loved myself truly and deeply, would I let myself experience this?"
Here are some other meditations. I attempted to distill the most helpful parts of the book. This is not a full list, nor does it do the book full justice. But it’s a start.
Meditation: When waking up, consider asking yourself: “I wonder what good I will experience today?”
Meditation: “I vow to love myself with everything I’ve got, in my thoughts, my actions, my words — because I am worthy of deep and full-on love.”
Meditation: The greatest gift of loving yourself is that you start letting go. And life is won by those who let go. “Return to the present and give yourself love every chance you get.”
Meditation: "Stare death in the sockets. Live this way and I won’t have any choice but to be the greatest me.”
Meditation: “If I could float above the earth and watch history unfold, all the human drama from the past to the present spinning by, and then zoom down to the physical me, sitting there in pain, what would I say? I would be gentle with myself. I would look into my eyes with deep love and say, “It’s okay. Let go. Wish her the best, wish her good, and let go. Be in the light and trust in life.”
Meditation: Rather than goals to achieve, I will decide who I want to be. And then state that clearly. I ask myself: “If I loved myself truly and deeply, who would I be? The answer is clear: I would be excellent. Then I ask myself: What would this require? Again, clear answer: Loving myself fiercely.”
Meditation: What would your future self say to you today? Your future self who has been through everything you’ve been through and beyond. Ravikant’s meditation involves imagining your future self standing in front of you with a loving and understanding smile. “And then, he hugged me, kissed the top of my head, and gave me love. There was nothing for me to do. Only receive love. My love. Do this.”
Meditation: Similar to the above is “Childhood Strings.” Place your hand over your heart, visualize your younger, childhood self in front of you. Let any emotions flow. Feel your heartbeat, which belongs to you both. Then, give your young self your love. Give your childhood self all the love you’ve got. There is nothing to solve or fix. You can do this meditation for your childhood self, or for who you were yesterday, a month ago or a year ago. “Give your past self the love you needed. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do.”
Meditation: Ravikant tells the story of meeting a friend who told him that she had died and was brought back. She was clinically dead and came back to life. She now lives as if this life, today, is heaven. This echoes a similar thought from Anita Moorjani, author of “What if This is Heaven?” Moorjani’s goal, similarly, is to truly love oneself in the face of life’s challenges. Loving yourself is integral to our fulfillment here on earth. And viewing our life as heaven is a meditation that can get us there. So, on repeat, I’m asking: What if this is heaven? Maybe it is.
Ravikant leaves us with the importance of not waiting to love ourselves. With anything, we may not ever be “ready.” That's OK: Just jump in. Let’s not wait. Today, let’s go all-in on loving ourselves and truly internalize these mediations. We can put them to good use.
One good quote: "Devote the rest of your life to making progress." — Epictetus.
One good talking point for your next conversation: Tell me something beautiful about your life.
Be joyful and celebrate your gifts,
Matthew
The path to self actualization is usually found within us. These meditations can help smooth the path. Thanks, Matt.